Gender & Identity

Biromantic, Cliterference and Gynosexual: A (non-exhaustive) list of queer terms Pt II

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On Jun 2, 2022

Biromantic, Cliterference and Gynosexual: A (non-exhaustive) list of queer terms Pt II

We shall keep saying that sexuality and gender are on a beautiful spectrum that we can slide back and forth on. Here are some more terms that can help guide you on your way to figuring it out. This is part two of an article we posted before outlining a WHOLE bunch of sexuality terms, read part I here.

Gynosexual = Someone who is attracted to femmine energy or femininity. 

Genderqueer = A gender identity label often used by people who do not identify with the binary of man/woman; or as an umbrella term for many gender non-conforming or non-binary identities (e.g., agender, bigender, genderfluid).  

Heteroflexible = A person who is pretty much heterosexual, but not exclusively so (yes this is a thing). (See also homoflexible.)

Note: Sexuality is a spectrum even if it seems divided into hard and fast boxes. Your sexual orientation can slide up and down the scale. You can, in fact, taste a lot of the rainbow throughout the course of your life.

Heteroromantic = Folx who are romantically attracted to members of the opposite sex, this might or might not involve sexual attraction.

Homoflexible = A person who is mostly attracted to the same sex/gender, but can, on occasion be attracted to the opposite sex/gender.

Homoromantic = A person who is romantically attracted to a member of the same sex, this might or might not involve sexual attraction.

Homosexual = The gays, the queers and this was the original clinical psychology term for folx with same-sex sexual attraction. It had a bad past because then queerness was seen as a disorder, and “homosexual” was used as a slur) but it has in some spaces been reclaimed.

Lesbian = A woman who is emotionally, romantically, sexually, affectionately, or relationally attracted to other women, or someone who identifies as a member of the lesbian community.

Lipstick Lesbian = A lesbian with a feminine gender expression i.e. rocking heels and lipstick. Can be used in a positive way or negative way, depending on who is using it. See also femme.

MSM = An abbreviation for men who have sex with men, and focused on the behaviour, rather than the identities of the individuals involved (i.e. not gay but MSM).

The Muffia  = They wear business suits, they have a lot of money and they make things happen. Think Bette from The L Word. Always intimidating, but very sexy.

Omnisexual = A person who is sexually attracted to all sexes/genders. This term has a pansexual vibe.

Otter = Gay folx who are slender, hairy member of the bear community with a passive personality.

Packing  = When a person wears a strap-on under their clothes to give the impression that there is “something else” there. Socks can also be used. 

Pansexual = A person who is emotionally, romantically, sexually, affectionately, or relationally attracted to people regardless of their gender identity or biological sex. Use of the term usually signals a repudiation of the concept of binary (two) sexes (a concept sometimes implied by “bisexual”).

Panromantic = A person whose romantic attractions are not influenced by sex or gender identity.

Polyromantic = A person who is romantically attracted to all or many genders or gender expressions.

Queen = Slang to refer to flamboyant or effeminate gay men, it can either be negative or positive, because it has been reclaimed by some queens who now werk it.

Queer = An umbrella term for all the folks who are not straight/heteronormative a.k.a. have a non-normative gender identity, sexual orientation or sexual anatomy. It includes lesbians, gay folx, intersex folx, bisexual, pansexual and asexual folx, transgender folx and allies.

Queerplatonic = A type of non-romantic relationship where there is a strong emotional bond and commitment amongst everyone involved that goes beyond what is traditionally thought of as friendship e.g. giving your bestie love, hugs, kisses and dates.

Questioning = When folx are figuring out their sexual orientation and/or gender identity.

Same-Gender Loving (SGL) = A term created by African-Americans to move away from the whiteness of terms such as “gay” and “lesbian. Also “Same-sex loving” is another phrase.  

Sapiosexual = Folx who are emotionally, romantically, sexually, affectionately, or relationally attracted to intelligence and its use. Folx looking for some mind sex.

Sensual Attraction = Desire to have physical non-sexual contact with someone else, like affectionate touching.

Skoliosexual= Being primarily sexually, romantically, and/or aesthetically attracted to genderqueer, transgender, and/or non-binary people.

Squish = Having an interest in somebody that goes beyond traditional friendship roles and experiences. An aromantic “crush,” a desire for a platonic relationship with someone.

Stem = A queer woman who identifies somewhere between “stud” and “femme”.

Stud = Another term coined by the African-American and Latinx communities in the US to describe masculine lesbians. Also known as “aggressive” or “ag.” 

Switch = A person who is both a top and a bottom. See top and bottom.

Top = A term found in gay, lesbian and BDSM circles. For gay men – a top penetrates a partner. For lesbians – a top is the one who prefers to be more active in sex. For BDSM folx – usually called a dom.

WSW = An abbreviation for women who have sex with women. This term emphasises the behaviour, rather than the identities of the individuals involved (e.g. not a lesbian but WSW).

Wolf = An aggressive, more dominant and hairy slender bear.

Twink = A slang term used to describe a young or young-looking man with little or no facial or body hair. A contemporary definition is  someone who can secure the bag from blessers and is depicted as hyper feminine. Sometimes used as a shady, rude way to describe someone.

P.S. Twink can sometimes be used in a derogatory way so check yourself before throwing it around. 

Further Reading

Check out the Basically…Life Podcast (on all platforms) and our YouTube series We Are F**kin Here for other vibes that show how queers are living, lovin’ and f*ckin.

For more info about all things gender and sexuality download our Touch Manual which has a bunch of info about dating, sexuality, gender, sex and much more!

Also visit our Instagram page and Twitter account for even more great content!
To submit to HOLAA email: submissions@holaafrica.org