Sexuality is a spectrum and gender is a construct. Thems the facts. With that in mind there is a lot to learn about these two ideas so we decided to gather this (non-exhaustive) list of sexuality and gender terms. Check out part II here.
Note: Some of these terms you may not identify with or may find uncomfortable. So if you have any additions or see some terms you think deserve to be removed, leave us a comment.
A/Ace = Slang type abbreviation for “asexual” and houses the whole asexual spectrum (it’s an umbrella term kinda like “gay” or“straight”).
Ace Spectrum = The asexual squad which includes demisexual, and gray-asexual folx under a single umbrella of related sexual orientations.
Aesthetic Attraction = When you like how someone rocks their outfits and you’re feeling how they look a.k.a, attraction to someone’s appearance, without it being romantic or sexual.
Androsexual = The sexual orientation of anyone who has sexual feelings towards a man or masculine vibes.
Aromantic = Someone who experiences little or no romantic attraction. This is usually seen as something that is a part of a person as opposed to a choice (i.e. choosing to be celibate). Aromantic people typically get their love and cuddles from platonic relationships.
Asexual= Someone who does not experience sexual attraction towards other people (i.e. they are not trying to butter your biscuit, honey). Asexual folx identify as asexual and may or may not experience romantic, emotional or physical attractions to other people.
Beard= A person who marries or dates a queer person who is in the closet in order to help them hide their sexuality.
Beersexual= A person who will only engage in queer activities when under the influence. Often seen in television shows and often happens between close female friends.
Bigender= A person who fluctuates between traditionally “woman” and “man” gender-based behaviour and identities.
Biromantic = Aperson who is romantically attracted to ‘both’ sexes or genders i.e. male and female but it isn’t necessarily a sexual thing. Or someone who identifies as a member of the bisexual community (including those who are attracted to folx of different genders, not just two genders).
Bisexual= A person who is emotionally, romantically, sexually, affectionately or relationally to various genders (but more commonly thought as being attracted to the ‘two genders’).
Cliterference= The queer woman version of cock-blocking (e.g. “When you called me to help you find your phone at the bar I was talking to that beautiful woman. You ran cliterference, my G.”).
Ceterosexual= Someone who experiences sexual/romantic attraction only to non-binary people.
Constellation= A way to describe the arrangement or structure of a polyamorous relationship (also known as a polycule).
Demiromantic = A person who does not experience a romantic attraction unless they have formed a strong emotional bond. A demiromantic person may or may not experience sexual attraction.
Demisexual = Folx who don’t experience sexual attraction unless they have a strong emotional connection (such as a romantic relationship or deep friendship). Demisexuality is not a choice, it is an intrinsic orientation.
Down-low = (Usually) men who identify as straight, but have sex with folks of the same gender on the side without disclosing this to their partner(s).
Dolphin = A slender, athletic, hairless bear (all roads lead back to the bear).
Femme = 1. A person who expresses and/or presents culturally/stereotypically feminine characteristics 2.A specific lesbian identity centred around femininity (e.g. butch/femme).
Note: Femme invisibility is when femmes cannot catch a break. To sum up it is when folks do not know you are a lady loving lady because you dress and present as “straight.” ‘Cause of this feminine-presenting lesbian women are disbelieved, passed over, or intentionally ignored in gay and straight communities alike.
Finsexual = The attraction to women, females and femininity.
Fuckboi= A nonsense ass female-bodied person or boy who you should block immediately. Usually avoids being in a relationship/ healthy interaction through various manipulations or simply snaking and dodging you when they do not want to engage properly. Or simply constantly reminding you “but we ain’t together though”. Block ‘em on all platforms and do not let them see you naked.
Futch = Feminine lesbian who also has butch swag.
Faux Mo = Straight girls who act/look/seem interested in being queer, but are as straight as they come.
Grey-A = The grey area between asexuality and allosexuality, where some folks see themselves landing. Grey-A identifying persons can include people who: do not normally experience sexual attraction, but do experience it sometimes; experience sexual attraction, but have a low sex drive; experience sexual attraction and drive, but not strongly enough to want to act on them; people who can enjoy and desire sex, but only under very limited and specific circumstances.
Greyromantic = The grey area between being aromantic and experiencing romantic attraction. Greyromantic identifying persons can include people who: do not normally experience romantic attraction, but do experience it sometimes; experience romantic attraction, but not strongly enough to want to act on it; people who experience romantic attraction but only under very limited and specific circumstances.