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Tag: #1in3

10 years on: Zuma rape trial, protests and a macabre anniversary

  •  Posted in Afro Sexual Politics, Blog
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By Kagure Mugo Women’s Month is here – a time when everyone has 24 hours to convince themselves that women may actually exist, and for adverts to suddenly peg everything on “the softer sex”. The Women’s Month is also the 10-year anniversary of one particular poster boy’s rape trial acquittal. It has been a decade […]
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4 Signs Porn Is Damaging Your Relationship with Your Girlfriend http://holaafrica.org/2017/06/23/4-signs-porn-is-damaging-your-relationship-with-your-girlfriend/4 Signs Porn Is Damaging Your Relationship with Your Girlfriend“Why do I watch porn? It’s like, sometimes you want to go out to brunch with friends and all drink mimosas together. And sometimes you just want to have a glass of wine in bed by yourself.” – Maxine, The Carmichael Show.It seems like just about everyone watches porn. Even straight women love lesbian porn. Like, they love it a lot. But is porn getting in the way of your romantic relationship with your girlfriend? Keep an eye out for the warning signs.1. You prefer porn instead of your girlfriend.Why do people like porn? It’s convenient, it’s free, it’s sexy, it’s adventurous and, let’s say, it does the job.In comparison, sex is messy. Complicated. Dirty. Sometimes unsatisfying. And if you’re not into it, you can’t just switch partners like you would switch a porn video.So it makes sense that you’d prefer porn sometimes. But if you run to your favorite websites before you run to your girlfriend, that’s going to drive a wedge in the relationship.2. You want your girlfriend to act like a pornstar.Pornstars are professionals with perfect, sometimes extremely flexible, bodies. Making porn is their full-time profession – that’s why they’re a star.Your girlfriend, as wonderful as she is, can probably not do all of the things that a pornstar can do.3. You expect your girlfriend to have sex all the time, anytime.What’s the best part about porn? Well, it’s free. But what’s the second best part? It’s on-demand. Whenever you’re feeling risqué, there are millions of videos available.In real life, sex is not nearly as readily available, unless you spend every night at a sex party. Your girlfriend just won’t want to have sex sometimes. Sometimes she’ll be on her period. Sometimes she just won’t be in the mood. If you find yourself resenting her for that, take a step back.4. You use porn to spite your girlfriend.When your girlfriend doesn’t want to have sex, it’s tempting to load up your laptop instead. And that’s not always bad, as long as she’s okay with you looking at porn. But don’t do this allthe time. It sets the precedent that if she won’t give you what you want, you’ll find sexual satisfaction elsewhere, which will just put more distance between you two.Instead, when your girlfriend isn’t in the mood, talk to her. Do something relaxing like watch TV together. Cook for her. There are 1,000,000 ways to be intimate with someone, and most of them aren’t “sex.”And talk to your girlfriend about why she isn’t in the mood. Maybe she’s been feeling stressed lately, or maybe she’s been feeling like she can never measure up to the women in the videos.But remember, as long as it doesn’t get in the way of your relationship, porn isn’t all bad. In fact, you and your girlfriend can actually learn a few things from it.Make sure that it does not take over your life and sex. If you can keep it together here is a list of the best lesbian porn sites.This post was first published on KitschMix.Com.*leave a comment on the post, you can write it under a different name and your email will not be published.*To submit to HOLAA! email submissions@holaafrica.orgmango-s0da: Have I told you how pretty you are?About 11 times just todayitsallpeachykeen: decided to rework my tabrisi love her??bellraven:Brown Girls (2017) dir. Sam BaileyA new web series by Fatimah Asghar that follows Leila, a South Asian-American writer just now owning her queerness and her best friend Patricia, a sex-positive Black-American musician who is struggling to commit to anything: job, art and relationships. While the two women come from completely different backgrounds, their friendship is ultimately what they lean on to get through the messiness of their mid-twenties. watch trailer here (x)bellraven:Brown Girls (2017) dir. Sam BaileyA new web series by Fatimah Asghar that follows Leila, a South Asian-American writer just now owning her queerness and her best friend Patricia, a sex-positive Black-American musician who is struggling to commit to anything: job, art and relationships. While the two women come from completely different backgrounds, their friendship is ultimately what they lean on to get through the messiness of their mid-twenties. watch trailer here (x)bellraven:Brown Girls (2017) dir. Sam BaileyA new web series by Fatimah Asghar that follows Leila, a South Asian-American writer just now owning her queerness and her best friend Patricia, a sex-positive Black-American musician who is struggling to commit to anything: job, art and relationships. While the two women come from completely different backgrounds, their friendship is ultimately what they lean on to get through the messiness of their mid-twenties. watch trailer here (x)bellraven:Brown Girls (2017) dir. Sam BaileyA new web series by Fatimah Asghar that follows Leila, a South Asian-American writer just now owning her queerness and her best friend Patricia, a sex-positive Black-American musician who is struggling to commit to anything: job, art and relationships. While the two women come from completely different backgrounds, their friendship is ultimately what they lean on to get through the messiness of their mid-twenties. watch trailer here (x)bellraven:Brown Girls (2017) dir. Sam BaileyA new web series by Fatimah Asghar that follows Leila, a South Asian-American writer just now owning her queerness and her best friend Patricia, a sex-positive Black-American musician who is struggling to commit to anything: job, art and relationships. While the two women come from completely different backgrounds, their friendship is ultimately what they lean on to get through the messiness of their mid-twenties. watch trailer here (x)
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