Always Anticipation

A face

A crown of dreadlocs

A talent for curating words into fists that dismantle

An energy

A vibe

An overwhelming anxiety

A possessiveness

An extra tooth in her smile

A dimple in her thigh

A talent of mine to imagine the parts of you I am yet to know

To fill in the gaps between ‘let’s do a thing’ and ‘You are the thing I want to do’

Between ‘I like your dress’ and ‘I love how you pulse in my mouth when you cum’

Between ‘let’s go on a road trip’ and ‘let’s grow tomatoes and find a school for her here rather’

I anticipate the flash of your name across my screen

I anticipate ‘I like you, let’s do this’

I anticipate what ‘this’ will be

I anticipate the warmth of your breathe against my neck and the wet of your lips on my tongue

I anticipate your cold hand between my warm thighs in the snow in Brussels

I anticipate you telling me I am not giving you enough

I anticipate my hesitation in letting her go – both the one I know and the one I am still anticipating

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Anything and everything I do comes from a place of blackness, queerness, feminism and most importantly love :) All round badass and lover of words, written and read. Check out Amanda on IG: manda_hodge
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