*Trigger warning: abelist language
by NYAR Afrika
“Are you okay?” I ask her as I gently kiss her neck.
“mmh” she mumbles, her mind seemingly far away.
“You are thinking of your husband again.”
She goes unnaturally still in my arms.
“No” she blatantly lies. “I am thinking about us.”
That surprises me. She never talks about us when we are together. To her, I am this dirty little secret, something she enjoys having by her side. I am okay with that. Personally, I am not out looking for anything that would tie me down. Being a commitment phobe, I avoid relationships like a plague. Fuck and move on. That is what I always live by.
“what about us babe?”I ask as I gently bite her earlobe. A little moan escapes her.
I smile to myself. One of the many reasons why I like this woman is because of her sensuality, besides her foul temper that is. Her sex appeal is to die for and she is an active participant in bed. She gives as much as she takes.
“Do you see a future with us?” She asks her voice barely audible.
I go stiff in her arms. “future?” My own voice comes out husky and strange.
“Yes baby. A future.” She turns to look at me, her eyes pleading with mine. I am momentarily speechless.
I put some distance between us by moving towards the farthest end of the bed and look at her, “what about your husband?”
“I’ll leave him.”
“No” I exclaim as I stand up. I pace around the room in frustration. My thoughts come at me in torrents. My naked skin glistens in the dull bedroom light. I turn around to look at my lover. She is looking at me intently. Tears in her eyes.
I kneel down in front her.
“Look babe. Here is the thing. You can’t leave Biko for me. Not now. Not any day. Understood?”
“but.. but I want you.” She whines.
“No Nyelethi. You will not leave Biko for me. He might be away from the country but he loves you and God knows what I would do when another person tries to take away my lover. You get me?”
She meekly nods in agreement. She looks so young and sweet and innocent almost docile but then again, looks are bloody deceiving.
She breaks into tears again.
I ran my hands through my hair in frustration.
I pull her into an embrace and let her bury her face in my chest.
“For God’s sake Nyelethi, You making this hard for me you know? I like you okay? I’m just not ready for a relationship. I fucking hate commitments.”
I tilt her chin up and roughly kiss her lips. Another moan slides out of her. Shit. My own sex is already throbbing inside my knickers.
“I’m not happy,” she says in a barely audible voice as soon as I let go of her lips.
“I know babe. I know. But you gotta try harder.” I comfort her as I rub her back.
“I don’t want to try!” she shouts at me while getting up.
“Don’t you just fucking get it? I want you! You!”
“You want me for my body Nyelethi. You are using me for the sex. When your fucking husband arrives, you will obviously go back to him. You are not even a fucking lesbian! Don’t you get it?” I snap back, my anger already taking a hold on me. She screams out in frustration as she throws the vase on my bedside table on the wall and it shatters into a million pieces. I forcefully grab her hands as soon as she reaches out to break another vase.
“You don’t get to break things in my house.” My voice comes out harsher than I expect it to.
She flinches as if she has been slapped but quickly collects herself. “I can throw whatever I want. This is my lover’s house!” she screams at me.
“You are crazy Nyelethi. You are a mental case.” I know I am hurting her but I don’t care. My own anger blinds my ability to reason clearly.
I let go of her arms and head towards the kitchen to grab a drink. When I come back, I find her banging her head repeatedly on the wall. She is mumbling to herself.
I set my drink down on the table and reach out to hold her. She doesn’t seem to notice me since she squeals in surprise when I kiss her neck. She turns around to face me and immediately starts hitting my shoulders.
“Babe.” She refuses to look at me. “Babe.” I call her again. No response. Just muffled sobs.
Cursing, I raise her off the ground and pin her to the wall. Using my thighs to support her weight. She feels so light in my arms. Without giving her time to protest, I claim her mouth in a not so gentle kiss that is laced with anger and frustration. Her nails claw at my back as she whimpers softly.
I kiss her mouth. Her nose. Her ears. I suck on a sensitive spot on her neck. She takes a deep breath before shouting out my name in wonder.
“Mmmh. I mumble as I reach down to take one taut nipple in my mouth. Biting it gently, I let her call my name repeatedly. “You like it huh?” I whisper into her ear as I reach up to kiss her again.
She nods, too aroused to speak. I yank away her knickers in one swift move and in no time, my fingers are deep inside her, clearly expressing my anger and frustrations.
Her moans are broken and she is too weak to say anything. She rides my fingers like it’s her last.
She takes one nipple into her mouth and gently bites on it.
“Fuck.” I mutter to myself.
I can feel my own orgasm building up and I can tell she is ready too. We both climax at the same time, our orgasms so strong that it leaves us gasping for air in no time.
We stay like that for a while. My fingers still in her. Me pinning her against the wall. This feels like heaven. We are too sated to speak. Our momentary peace is broken by a bang on my door.
Biko walks in looking as deadly as ever. He pulls out a gun and aims it at me, shooting my shoulder. I let go of Nyelethi’s body and sink into the floor wincing in pain. My shoulder feels like it’s on fire.
I feel Biko’s boot connect with my ribs and I double up in pain again. I cough out blood and an incessant buzz fills my ear.
“Biko. No!” I hear Nyelethi’s voice from a distance pleading with him.
“Stay out of this! He yells at her before roughly pushing her on the bed.
Biko bends down to look into my eyes and I use this moment to spit at him.
Taking advantage of his sudden surprise that throws him off-guard, I punch him in the face. Hard. He topples over and falls down on his butt. His nose is already bleeding. Nyelethi is sobbing gently on my bed. My need to be here for her overpowers the feeling of hatred I am currently having.
“Fuck this family.” I mentally curse again.
I walk towards her and gently touches her arm, I check to see is she is OK. She nods before lifting her face from my pillow to look at me.
Her eyes grow wide with fear.
“Biko! No!” She screams.
Something heavy and metallic hits my head and I collapse on the floor.
©Nyar Afrika 2017.
For a little erotic check out An Aggressive Apology, Ruffled, When four women meet and Three Women a bottle and a sunny place. There is also something a little sensual in She leans against me and Reuniting with my lover.
*leave a comment on the post, you can write it under a different name and your email will not be published.*
To submit to HOLAA! email firstname.lastname@example.org