By Sibu Malungu
I am awake
Dreams have been shattered
I am grateful
I am in pain
My hope for us is gone
But it’s okay
Now I can fully embrace another
Damn, I am here again? Lying to myself
When I know that my heart may never heal
My hope may never be returned
And the innocent will have to be my tourniquet
I am not grateful…or maybe I should be
With every reality snap back, I grow
Or maybe I just give up
See, philosophy has it all figured out
Sadly, my heart chooses not that route
The pain kills me, I don’t grow
I can’t let go
But I am here again
Am I demented? Why can’t I leave this undefended love?
Have I been defeated?
Quotes have prescribed the steps
Yet I keep going from 1 to 3 and back to negatives
My condition isn’t as easy as ABC
Damn it!!! Where are the real solutions?
I can’t come back here
Love should never be a condition or so the poets say
But it is for me, what kind of reality takes no prescribed solutions?
Take away the pain of loving
take my heart too.
I may never own it back.
I am here, confused and broken
But pretending to be healing
Dealing the cards life dealt
Or did you deal them?
Maybe I did
with no one else
But I am here
Angry and so in love
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